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Phil Parker's Empire Biscuits review

The Russians have caviar, the French fine wine, but beating them all, the Scots have the delicious Empire Biscuit.

Available from nearly all bakeries as well as most Spars and Co-ops north of the border and none in the south (Americans note, this means England), the Empire Biscuit is formed from two shortbread biscuits with a filling of sorts topped by icing and a glace cherry.

A biscuit for those with a sweet tooth as the icing is very sickly no matter who the maker is. Fortunately the coating is thin and the shortbread dampens the taste a little. The biscuit material is soft and crumbly when fresh and even softer should you leave it for a day or two thus establishing its biscuit credentials. The filling is that indistinguishable stuff that has no natural ingredients and no real taste; but it performs its duty of holding the two biscuits together very effectively allowing the eater to work his or her way around the edge leaving the section with the cherry on it as a prize at the end of the session.

This biscuit has absolutely no potential for dunking. Indeed even the thought of putting something like this in tea is abhorrent.

The name is a mystery as Scotland isn't a country known for its empire. Perhaps the canny Celts are taking the rise out of the neighbours for the loss of theirs ?